I’m still working on unpacking from the move- the November/December holiday rush set me back a bit. Today, I looked up some guidelines for discarding health and beauty products, just to see what happens to various products as they age and what has a better shelf life. Some of my older products are sitting in the trash now, but absolutely all of my makeup is in the trash now.
I wanted to wear makeup everyday, back when I was 13 or so, but I stopped pretty quickly. I don’t remember why- I think that it was probably because I had bad skin, and I didn’t want to get makeup inside of my acne and get it all infected. So pretty quickly, I went from using liquid foundation, powder, blush, and lip gloss back to my natural skin, but I kept my makeup for special occasions.
I felt like there must be some events at which it was important to look extra beautiful and less like myself, but they never came. I didn’t go to high school dances (no interest). I didn’t need it for my graduation. I didn’t wear any to the 2 dances I attended in college. I didn’t wear any to my wedding.
And the world kept spinning. And my friends and family still loved me anyway. And my husband still thought I was beautiful.
So today, when I opened the teal Tigger box where my first makeup has laid, forgotten, for years… there was a rich wave of feelings that swept over me. Security and sufficiency in my appearance. Sympathy for the women I know who can’t leave home without “putting on their faces.” Mild disgust for the bacteria which has inevitably grown inside of my really old, gross makeup. Overall, it just feels good to know that I don’t need makeup- not to attract my husband’s attention, not to feel good about myself, not for anything.
This is the end. I’ve thrown out all I have, and I don’t foresee any occasion on which I will need to purchase any more. I’m just going to be myself until I die, and even then, the world will just keep spinning.